*tumbleweeds*

So, I have been gently reminded several times that it has been awhile since I have updated.

Well, I have been busy. EXCUSE ME.

Nah, sorry. I feel bad. I have had a bunch of stuff going on, a lot of it that would be incredibly relevant to this blog, but I just haven't sat down to update. Gonna try and correct that right now. Biggest thing?

Vanessa and I finally have full legal custody of Matt. This is huge. This is the culmination of two years of pain, heartbreak and frustration. Getting custody was not easy. First, there was a huge battle with bio-mom. She was so convinced that she would get custody and was so angry at us that she fought us tooth and nail. It was ugly. We walked away a couple of times. It was one of the most emotional times of my life and I don't ever want to go through anything like it ever again.

But things finally came around and my parent's got custody of Matt. There's a good reason for this: they have money. Vanessa and I aren't homeless, nor are we broke, but we're not buying gold-plated anythings anytime soon. It was easier for the courts and CSB if my parents and custody. So they got it and Vanessa and I did the muscle work.

And then came Em. That was super simple. Emotional and painful but in completely different ways. And overall, simple. Just paperwork. Which is what it finally boiled down to with Matt as well. We filed some paperwork, paid some fees and waited.

The letter was non-descript. Just like any other letter addressed to me. But when I pulled the papers out, they looked distinctly like court documents. Realization was immediate and profound. I fucking cried like a baby. In my heart, Matt has always been my son and I didn't care what anyone else thought. Still, the official label was important. Now, I don't have to explain it to anyone. Matt is my son is my son is my son. All day, every day.

It was a great day. I love my kids. I love my family. And now, we're officially completely a real family.